What happens as we and some of the world (at this writing) start opening businesses, schools, social and sporting events, etc.? The new Delta variant hitting hard in Israel, the UK and here has many wondering if this open up, shut down, open up, shut down, will ever stop. Many involved scientists say that this will be our continuing reality. How do we respond, having ‘abnormalized’ our behavior for many months? Little or a lot, this virus has changed and is continuing to change all our lives.
Making the best of any situation, whether dire or minor, means moving forward to a positive vision. History is history. Learn from it, but then let the bad times go. You do that by focusing on what you want, not what you don’t. Most haven’t defined what they DO want and as a result make poor decisions, procrastinate and have issues with confidence and self esteem. Usually these issues turn into weight problems, drug dependencies, anxieties, procrastination, sleepless nights, enervated days and in sales, poor consistency and performance.
In my coaching I hear a lot of ‘why I am the way I am’ stories. Not trying to sound callous, but, why would I want to hear that? The simple telling and retelling of all the hardships, the trials and tribulations, looking to park the blame somewhere or on someone, actually reinforces the memories and insures their repetition.
Think about the last time you were face to face with someone telling a ‘woe is me’ story. I’ll bet that if you were aware of your body language, 60 seconds or less into their story, your eyes rolled up, or you shifted your feet, checked the time, or took an awakening breath, or interrupted with your own anecdote. Few people really care about your story. It’s theirs they need to tell. Inching out of the pandemic for many can be about speaking a different, more positive, picture of a better future, narrative.
Here are 5 thoughts about re-entering a changed world.
As we return to social and business gatherings without masks and social distancing, most will be cautious as new rules are defined and variant numbers surge. Even with vaccinations.
1) It’s an excellent time to make friends and cement existing relationships by asking questions and proactively listening. Repore building is always, and especially now, appropriate. Inching out of the pandemic for many simply means being heard.
For you entrepreneurs it’s a great time to strengthen relationships through building repore and empathy. Not just with your sphere of influence, but with the new people you add to that list each day. Each person has a story. Are you asking and paying attention? Buyers buy benefits not features. Are you listening for what they want?
Everyone has a need to tell their story. Feeling heard and seen creates a bio chemical reaction producing far more than a dopamine rush, but the production of serotonin and oxytocin. These are neurotransmitters involved in creating trust. With whom do people do business? Not necessarily with the most brilliant, but generally the one who is bonded by trust.
If you have difficulty in starting conversations or maintaining them, I suggest reading a book my wife Nan came across. The title is, The Book of Beautiful Questions, by Warren Berger. Doesn’t the title just sound like everyone should read it? Well, it’s more than marketing. It’s essential for most. Learn to ask meaningful, thoughtful and involving questions.
2) Some will be ‘gun shy’ about touching. It will take time for some to progress from a head nod, to a fist bump to and actual hug. Don’t be overly aggressive physically until you’ve read the comfort level of others. The extraordinarily high percentage of people feeling isolated and alone during the pandemic left scars. Some scars are easy to see. Some, go too deep to be easily recognized. Be even more sensitive to body language and tone of voice to pick up clues to put others at ease.
3) Office meetings will be different in numbers of attendees. The energy, the camaraderie, the casualness that was, will not be there in this, the beginning of Opening Up, according to many polls and social psychologists. Whatever the balance of Zoom vs. Live, ends up being, it’s not going to be the Good Old Days. Adjust your thinking and strategies accordingly. As always, but more so now, your motivation needs to come from within, not the water cooler gang at the office. Learn coping/thriving strategies.
4) Be present. Get ahead of the curve by being more in each moment. Paying attention is always a good idea and now, as feelings, attitudes, biases and actions change, is a great time to pause fo the extra moment and process what’s going on around and in you. That pause can help you rethink a poor snap judgement, readjust a hasty response, make a better decision. Mindfulness apps aren’t getting the play they are because they are frivolous. My You Tube channel has gotten hundreds more visitors per month than ever before as folks look for positive grounding… something to do proactively to control whatever we can of our lives. It’s only human nature. Inching out of the pandemic means being aware, letting go of stress and looking forward to the next best choice.
5) This is the time to learn and use mental disciplines like hypnosis, touted by the top neuroscientists, for achieving goals, dealing with stress and anxieties, learning to focus, improving memory, controlling eating urges, developing empathy, changing habits, listening skills, selling and so much more.
Take me up on my offer of a Personalized Hypnosis Session, recorded specifically for you and your needs. No personal development tool is as powerful for shaping your future. I’ve created thousands of sessions over the past 40+ years. Let me guide you through the simply, elegant, powerful and effective process. Inching out of the pandemic, feeling safe and regaining your personal power can be easier than you think. You go where you look.
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