What do you do when you can’t get out of your own way?  Self motivation!

Imagine standing in a bucket and trying to pull yourself up by the handle.  Pull as you may, the harder you pull the more absurd the task. Everyone finds themself in that bucket occasionally. Most of us get stuck once in a while. Some get stuck on a regular basis and call it LIFE. It doesn’t have to be. Others learn skills and create solutions using techniques of self motivation.

General frustration with feelings of stuckness, bafflement, victimhood may show itself in disparate behaviors like road rage, bullying, misplaced aggression, aggressive and anti-social behavior, anxiety, poor sleep, procrastination, under achievement, poor health habits, strained family and social relationships. All these come more easily to those who don’t access positive options as “go-to’s.” There are ways to create the habit of accessing viable, self affirming habits. We can not only rise above stuck, we can make rising as automatic self sabotage once was.

At one end of the spectrum, some never learned coping or stress management skills. Some don’t believe they can change as if they are limited to who they were as children, as if limitation were a life sentence. They pay the price which can impact their business, feed overwhelming fears, limitations and quash self motivation. Lacking skills can lead to emptiness, a feeling of aloneness, abandonment, low self esteem and incarceration. It is the glue of stuck.

Some go to motivational seminar after motivational seminar, looking for the spark, the motto or cliche that will make THE difference. 20 minutes after the crowd experience is over, it’s usually back to usual as life patterns take over again.

And others were fortunate to have learned good coping skills as children and proceeded to grow and model those early lessons for themselves, their children and their world.

The good news is that solutions and skills are not only available, but easy to learn (brain plasticity) at any age.

The following are simple, effective tools for daily practice which will help you get and stay out of that bucket and to keep the balance and joy of your life high.

1.  Make time to read, listen and watch positive audio books, podcasts, video, apps and mentors that nourish ideas and stretch your positivity. Consider categories of motivation, neuroscience, and biographies.  The key for many is to block regular time and take notes. The idea that makes you pause, resonates with a truth within you, makes you say “YES!” is worth writing down.  TIP: Taking notes, even if you never re-read, makes faster learning and deeper brain network impressions.  It’s a step toward and part of DOing.

2.  Find a networking group. Join or start a mastermind group or book club that’s inspiring for you. You don’t know what you don’t know. Expanding your sphere of influence is an organic way of growing your life and business.  People have everything you want. Give them what they want. Listen, ask, support, pay attention.

3.  Let go of the small stuff.  Carrying around and repeating stories of disappointments, failures, shortcomings and fears  to yourself or others will only insure that they will come back more and stronger.  You go where you look.  Get out of your own head by focusing on, ideally a goal, and the very next thing you need to do to get there. Instead of focusing on what you don’t want, focus on what you DO want.

4.  Get away from toxic, energy draining, mind sapping people. You already know who they are. That includes the enablers who listen to and commiserate with your ‘pity party/blame game’ stories without supporting and offering positive options.

5.  The much touted gratitude list really is a great way to both start or end your day. Start the day with 2 minutes using a breath and thinking “thank you” for what you’ll be doing and who/what you can serve. End each day journalling for 2 minutes, focusing on what went right, whom you helped, who helped you. The feeling of joy you create by remembering the good things wipes away much of the stress hormone cortisol and replaces it naturally with the positive supportive neurotransmitters dopamine, oxytocin and serotonin.  It’ll help you sleep better and get a better start on your day.

6.  Chunk projects. Sometimes the sense of overwhelm can dominate when looking at the big picture.  A business goal becomes approachable when broken down to components.  The best way to predict your future is to create it by setting goals and chunking them into small doable bites. Confidence and a positive self-esteem come from creating victories. Those victories don’t have to be gynormous in size. Create small and large rewards for yourself as you hit performance benchmarks.

7.  Learn self-hypnosis for self motivation. Those who play victim are usually those who have too few tools. Be willing to learn and practice. This extraordinary tool of self hypnosis is used to reset. Used correctly, it puts life in perspective. It will reprogram negative behavior, and program success in personal and business areas. It energizes. The payoff is enormous for the rest of your life. A toolbox needs more than just a hammer.

8.  Have a GO TO ritual to both ‘snap you out’ of a mental funk and prepare for peak performance. A full life is not about not being punched down, it’s about how quickly we bounce up. Top athletes and performers create or learn triggers to switch gears when they need.

Whether the trigger comes in words like, “Focus Now,” “Better and Better,” or a physical cue like forming a circle with the thumb and index finger, tapping your thigh a few times, snapping your fingers twice, or taking 3 deep breaths, having an anchor to instantaneously center and regroup is a powerful tool for resilience and preparation. For those who’ve taken my program, use your waking hypnosis.

Learn and use a trigger not only for resilience, but also to use before any activity to create peak performance and to step up and shine. The words or gestures you choose aren’t important in and of themselves.  As you are consistent using them throughout the day and over time, they’ll become automatic to get the best out of yourself for whatever’s next. Use this Mindset technique to create the right attitude for peak performance.

Stay safe, loving, kind, and choose to thrive.

Barry