5 ways to CHANGE YOUR NARRATIVE and CREATE CONFIDENCE
1) Practice, practice, practice! In his book Outliers, Malcolm Gladwell shows it takes 10,000 hours, about 5 years, full time, to become brilliant at any specific vocation or avocation.
Note: that is with or without what others see as innate talent or predilection, moreover, it is repetition, discipline, and resilience, so it is work.
Agreed, if you want to be a Michael Jordan, a top doctor or a rocket scientist, go for the 10,000, however; studies also show that to get a good foundation for something, 20 hours of study, focus and/or participation will allow that. With preparation comes confidence and with repetition comes excellence.
2) Replace any negative self talk wherever you want to build confidence. Negative thoughts and pictures reinforce themselves as brain impressions. Self sabotage and limiting thoughts are chief reasons for negative, self fulfilling prophecies and poor confidence.
When quiet, limiting thoughts come, take a breath and consciously direct your attention to something pleasant like a painting, music, a fragrance, a scene outside your window. Diverting yourself from the negative self talk will get easier with time.
Replacing your thoughts and images with positivity and beauty set you up for your next thoughts and actions. Like a puppy being trained, the brain needs consistent encouragement to learn to do its best.
3) Use a trigger technique. Confident performers, over time, have either instinctively developed or consciously chosen to learn techniques to help them rise to any occasion.
It’s about focusing on what you DO want, not what you DON’T.
a. Before doing anything needing confidence and focus, circle the thumb and index fingers on one hand.
b. Take 2 or 3 deep, slow breaths through your nose to relax and better engage your neocortex, the critical thinking portion of your brain.
c. Tell yourself silently, in the best terms, how you are about to function in this upcoming activity. Examples:
- In this presentation I will listen well, present powerfully, close assertively and remain calm and relaxed throughout.
- I will play this round of golf with my best ever focus and concentration.
- I will relax and remember all correct answers on this test.
This is a focusing technique.
4) Work with a hypnosis session to reinforce confidence in each goal or positive change you desire because in a relaxed state of mind you become an excellent learner.
Once you’ve relaxed:
a. Tell yourself how or what your specific goal is using the present tense as if it were done.
b Imagine the picture of the final end result.
c. Feel the satisfaction of that end result.
Do this simple process with 5-10 goals, especially as you go to sleep. During your REM sleep, there is a tendency to reiterate those goals subconsciously creating more brain cells working in harmony toward your desired goals. Thoughts are things and you’ll become what you think. There’s nothing new about that comment, but this is a simple system to insure perfect practice and more confident, positive results.
5) Body language matters. If you are around others, be aware of holding eye contact, standing up instead of slouching, your hands in a comfortable position. Speak up and be aware of the tone of your voice and especially when you are alone, pay attention to your posture. Poor posture is another way we tell ourselves stories, so, tell a better story, create a different physiology and recognize the boost your confidence takes.
Free: Build Confidence Hypnosis Session
Here’s a new hypnosis session on confidence I created and posted on You Tube. Hope you enjoy!
